This week's smile

 

 

Dec 25 - Punch line is in the final section of this clip


Dec 18 - Christmas smile

Little boy in "Outback" Australia had never seen rain. 
There had been a drought for more than 5 years.
Then just before Christmas the clouds began to form.
On Christmas Eve  water fell from the sky.
The little boy ran to the window to see what was happening.
He called out to his mother "Mum, what's that?"
His mother replied "That's rain, dear"  (..reindeer..)


Dec 11 - Christmas smile

Santa's' sleigh broke down on Christmas Eve. He flagged down a passing motorist and asked, 
'Can you help me fix my sleigh, please?' 
'Sorry,' the motorist replied, 'I'm not a mechanic - I'm a podiatrist.'
 'In that case,' replied Santa, 'Can you give me a tow?'..[toe]!


Dec 4:

University students sitting at table in park next to McDonald's.
Old couple come and sit at nearby table.
Old couple have one bag from McDonald's, with one Big Mac, one French fries - which they divide in two.  
Uni students: "You must be very poor to have only one meal between two people.  We will buy you another meal"
Old couple: "No need, thank you.  We share everything. That's the way we do things"

...after a while.....uni students notice that although the old man and old woman are sharing the one cup of coffee,
only the old man is eating the Big Mac & fries

Uni students to old woman:  "why aren't you eating anything?"
Old woman:  "no problem.  We share everything.  I'm waiting for the teeth"


Nov 27:

Plane had pilot and 5 passengers: the USA president, the UN secretary general, a famous Nobel prize scientist, an old priest and a backpacker.
Pilot: plane's going to crash...we have to jump....but only 5 parachutes...I'm taking one...bye bye.
US president: I'm a very important man...I'm taking a parachute...bye bye.
UN sec'y gen: I also am very important...I'm taking a parachute...bye bye.
Scientist: I'm one of the smartest people in the world....I'm very important....I'm taking a parachute...bye bye.
Priest to backpacker: Well son, two of us and only 1 chute.  I've tried to live a good life. I'm ready to meet my Maker. You take the chute.
Backpacker to priest: No need for that, father. There are still 2 parachutes. The smartest man in the world just took my backpack